@seconddarrin Gingrich, Santorum, Romney. GO!

MAKEOUT: Santorum
MARRY: Romney
MURDER: Gingrich

Making out with Santorum is really giving me the creeps.

@jonjohns65 Yo-Yo Ma – Bob Loblaw – Lady Gaga

MAKEOUT: Yo-Yo Ma
MARRY:  Bob Lob Law
MURDER: Lady Gaga

Isn’t his name just Bob Lob and his Law firm is called Bob Lob Law?  Wouldn’t you want to live in Arrested Development’s world?

@dcsmith1 Wedding cake maker, wedding dress maker, or wedding photographer (answer after the wedding)

MAKEOUT:  Wedding photographer
MARRY:  Wedding cake maker
MURDER: Wedding dress maker

Who wouldn’t marry a CAKE MAKER?!?!

@kelleymcC  Benedict Cumberbatch, David Tennant, Martin Freeman

MAKEOUT: David Tennant
MARRY:  Benedict Cumberbatch
MURDER: Martin Freeman

All very attractive actors. Too attractive. Do they even like girls?

@riddikulus2  Steven Seagal, Steven Spielberg, Steven Q. Urkel

MAKEOUT: Steven Seagal
MARRY:  Steven Spielberg
MURDER: Steven Q. Urkel

I didn’t want to murder Steven but I was definitely thinking about Steven’s bank account when I did it.  See, money does terrible things to people.

@pedropodcast  Iron Man, Spiderman, Captain America

MAKEOUT: Iron Man
MARRY:  Spiderman
MURDER: Captain America

Iron Man is obviously the BEST BUT he is a player, yo.  I have to stick with Spiderman because I still haven’t seen the movie Captain America but I saw the previews and before he was Captain America, he was a pretty scrawny weird lookin’ dude.

@tmnjoel Cupid, Saint Valentine, Bugs Moran.

MAKEOUT:  Cupid
MARRY: Bugs Moran
MURDER:  Saint Valentine

That’s right, I am going to marry a gangster.

@theseanclrvin Ok, black history month theme George Washington Carver, Nat King Cole and Bill Clinton

MAKEOUT: George Washington Carver
MARRY: Nat King Cole
MURDER: Bill Clinton

Bill always gets all the attention from the ladies.

I liked this round. Everybody was on a different wave length and I appreciated a refreshing change from the usuals.  What I’m saying is, I didn’t have to marry Marilyn Manson for once!

Love,
JKJ

Happy Valentine’s Day.

Love,
JKJ

I FOUND A MORMON BOY WHO LIKES ME ENOUGH TO MARRY ME! (And I know he loves me because we’ve watched Heavyweights not once but TWICE together. #bestmovieever)

Why are you still crying?

Last night on the way to Allan’s parent’s house, after picking up the engagement ring we bought the day before, Allan pulled off the side of the road and popped the question.  For the record, I was surprised because I figured Allan would enjoy spending a few days teasing me with the ring.

So kids, I’m off the market.  I never thought it would happen but I’m very happy about it.

Enjoy some pics.

Engagement Ring!

Engagement Ring & Wedding Band. Jealous?

The side of the road where Allan proposed. I’ll remember that Lakewood Community College sign fondly.

That’s Allan!

Love,
JKJ

P.S. More wedding details to come…

The worst movies I saw:
Zookeeper
Beastly
Prom
Scream 4
The Dilemma
Monte Carlo (Ok fine, I sort of loved this one.)
Footloose

Then I thought, why stop there. Let’s look at the rest of my year in movies.

Movies I will see when they show up on Netflix:
The Roommate
Cowboys & Aliens
Rise of the Planet of the Apes (I would have gone in the theater but no one would see it with me.)
Reel Steel
Paranormal Activity 3
Tower Heist
We Bought A Zoo
New Year’s Eve

Movies you couldn’t pay me to see:
Sanctum
Hall Pass
Sucker Punch
Soul Surfer
Dolphin Tale
War Horse (I HATE horse movies.)
Puss In Boots (No way he deserve his own feature film.)
Jack & Jill
Happy Feet Two

Movies I was surprised I kind of liked:
I am Number Four
Jumping the Broom

Movies I Never Ever Ever Want To See Again:
Something Borrowed

Movies I still really want to see:
The Muppets
Hugo
The Iron Lady
cough *Twilight* cough

It feels so good to get this off my chest.

Love,
JKJ

Love,
JKJ

On Saturday night, my roommate and I threw a Candy Party. The inspiration: we have WAY too much candy in our house and we wanted to get rid of it.  We invited a few friends for candy and games.

Here’s what the table looked like:

We served the candy in baskets, used Twilight napkins (meant to be eye candy) and gave toothbrushes as a parting gift.

We also handed out brown bags and ziplocks so people could fill up a bag of candy to take home.

Other than candy, I also made Pink Popcorn which is a recipe my Grandma gave me years ago. It’s one of my favorite recipes. Mostly because I think it’s adorable.

Grandma’s Pink Popcorn

2 Cups Sugar
2/3 Cup Top Cream (Whole Milk or Half & Half)
1/4 Tsp. Salt
1 Tbsp. White Karo Syrup

1 Tsp Vanilla
1/4 Tsp Red Food Coloring

*Cook sugar, cream, salt and syrup to 230 degrees or just under soft ball stage. Add Vanilla, add coloring, pour over 6 quarts of popcorn. Pour on wax paper, allow to dry.

Games:
We played “Candy on a cracker” which was inspired by Jimmy Fallon. Apparently he does something like this on his show except with all kinds of food. Basically, we took three candies, put them on a ritz cracker, blinded folded the contestant and made him eat the entire cracker. They then have to guess which candy was on the cracker. That was a surprisingly big hit.

We also played CANDY bingo. You can have your own boards made here.

And on the table, we had three jars of candy and everyone had to guess how many candies were in each jar. The closest guess took the entire jar home.

We ended up talking and playing another non candy related game leaving us no time to watch Heavyweights, one of my favorite movies of all time.

My friend Karli posted her toothbrush and chocolate covered raisin winnings on facebook.

Instagram makes everything look so much better. I should use it for my next headshot.

The party was a huge hit AND super easy to put together. I already owned all of the serving dishes, buckets, baskets, napkins, etc. What? I love the dollar store.

And lastly, in the background we had a Candy Playlist playing on loop.

Songs included:
Candy – Mandy Moore
Milkshake – Kelis
Pour Some Sugar On Me – Def Leopard
Tootsie Roll – 69 Boyz
Candyman – Aqua
Candyman – Christina Aguilera
Lollipop – The Chordettes
Sugar, Sugar – The Archies
The Candy Man Can – Sammy Davis Jr.

Love,
JKJ

When did Robin Thicke start to sing like a sexy black man?

Is Vampire Dance-pocalypse a movie yet?

How many wives Newt Gingrich had

How many wives Anne Heche had

What year did Boy Meets World premiere?

How many pounds Oprah has lost in her lifetime

What IS cocoa butter?

Is Sinbad dead?

Is Fabio dead?

Is ska dead?

What is ska?

SOPA

New Guinea?

How much is a bajillion?

What is a buttload?

Who killed Rosie Larsen?

Dates of every Phish concert ever

Number of albums Aqua had

P. Diddy’s Mom’s name

Bop-it

Evolution

Science

Magic

Why is Anne Hathaway famous?

Rocky V

lyrics for “whip my hair back and forth”

What happened to K-Ci and Jo Jo?

Tupac Conspiracy

Moon Landing Conspiracy

Conspiracy Conspiracy

Immaculate Conception

WTF is celsius?

Joey

Matthew Broderick Cologne

What is balogna?

“healthy food”

famous fart jokes

To be continued…

What did you try to look up?

Love,

JKJ

Paula Deen has diabetes??? I thought the heart palpitations I got from eating Paula’s food was because I loved it so much!

Type II Diabetes? That’s the good kind right? Like the good kind of cholesterol?

Diabetes! No problem. Just eat more butter and less sugar.

Paula Deen has only had diabetes for 3 years? I would’ve guessed longer.

Just replace the sugar in Paula Deen’s recipes with cocaine to keep that addictive quality. And you’ll lose weight too!

So Paula Deen has diabetes. So what. Doesn’t that just make her more relatable to her fans?

Wilford Brimley better watch out. Diabetes testing supplies could’ve just found their new spokesperson.

Paula Deen’s Recipes for Diabetes. On bookshelves now!

I don’t blame Paula Deen. This is sugar’s fault for being so gosh darn delicious! #yumyum

I’m going to make my favorite Paula Deen recipe for dinner tonight in honor of this tragic news.

Love,
JKJ

Hello from ant1mat3rie on Vimeo.

Well done!

Love,
JKJ

This weekend I experienced two wonderful things.

Minor League Hockey and Portillo’s.

Allan and I went to see the Chicago Wolves play the Lake Eerie Monsters. They lost. But they put up a good fight. Literally. So much fighting.

Top 4 moments at the hockey game:

1. We bought the “expensive” tickets and were in the 3rd row right behind the team. The tickets were $25. The view was awesome. We could hear the coaches and players yelling and screaming and swearing. It was magical.

2. Their opening ceremonies. I love knowing this happens every single time they play:

3. During the 2nd fight of the game, the stadium played Train’s song, “Hey Soul Sister.” I always hated that song…until I heard it played over a raging hockey fight.

4. The Cheer-skaters. In between each 20 minute period, 4 frumpy girls would come out on the ice and try to hype the crowd. They were a little busted, particularly one of them. Of course, she was the one with the most enthusiasm. It was painfully awkward. Does no one love her enough to tell her to stop?

And then after the game, there was Portillo’s.

You guys, Portillo’s might be the most delicious food I’ve ever tasted. Forget all other fast food you’ve ever had. The Italian Beef with hot peppers, Jumbo Hot Dog with everything and the chocolate cake shake are unbelievably delicious. However, I just started a diet. So goodbye deliciousness. Thank you for the memories. #delicious #delicious #delicious

Love,
JKJ